Share Messy, Not Perfect

It’s hard to share with others. In particular, things we care about or have put effort into. Not the weather, but something you’re passionate about. Yet involving others creates the best results and is the most rewarding.

Social media bloomed as I grew up. And I’d have the most outrageous AIM away messages when I was younger. Zero shame. And as I matured, I began to share less and less. What would others think of this? It could lead to a possible adverse reaction, so why share. So I retreated to protect myself from dislike.

And sharing goes beyond social media. Sharing opportunities and problems with family, partners, and coworkers is difficult. We want to come with a perfect solution to present. And too often that causes us to leave things unaddressed.

But this isn’t sharing things that don’t matter, complaining, or being superfluous. And we’re concerned about being those things – those negative reactions I feared.

Moreso, I worked on projects and theories in the dark because I wanted to show how awesome I was. That I created this amazing thing. But the best way for me to create something of value is to share and take feedback from others.

This is a chef, toiling about the perfect recipe for their dish, and not letting anyone try until they’ve done it. But they’re reliant on their own tastes, and perhaps when they’ve got that grand meal, they find other’s don’t enjoy garlic as much as they’d thought. If they’d shared their earlier iterations with others, the chef could have incorporated that along the way instead of after a food critic has reviewed it.

Another example is if I wait to share a novel with someone until I’m ready to publish it, I’ve waited too long. The best outcomes are collaborative processes amongst many people. Nobody creates the best results alone. It’s through feedback and iteration that things are done best.

Max Yoder, who built and sold Lessonly and wrote Do Better Work and To See It, Be It, talks about how bringing things to people before their ready fosters teamwork and improved results. But it goes against our inclination to wait until something is finished to show others.

Take that feedback.

So here I am, sharing in public ideas I’m still working through and blogs that feel imperfect. And it’s still hard for me to put myself out there, unpolished. And I do it because I care about these things, and sharing them before I know gets me answers and to places I couldn’t have imagined.